My Anna on her Eighth (a belated letter)

Annabelle,

By now, I have run out of ways to describe how much I think of you, how much I like you.  You are the most interesting little girl I have ever known.  You just keep surprising me with what you choose to do, to say, to create, to think, to cry over, to forget all about.  Every day, a new idea, a stunning comment, a moving gesture, a silly setback, an impressive creation, a mature thought, an immature fit -  all just precious glimpses of the beautiful mess that is my girl making sense of and making her way in the world.  I stand back with wide eyes and shake my head at the wonder that is my daughter.  I am so proud of who you are.  I am so proud that you are mine!   You are the perfect blend of kid.  So innocent, so with it, so heartfelt!  I love you like crazy.  You are the best.  You are in the hands of our Lord and he is doing a precious work in you.  I count it all delight to watch your spirit unfold day by day.  It is with misty eyes and my hand over my heart that I record some specific and recent snippets that I treasure about you, my beautiful girl, here on your 8th birthday.  Mostly, they involve your head and heart ... aka all your messes, tears, words, and quirks. 

Oh, the tears...

• The other night you came downstairs holding a book you had just finished.  There were gentle tears in your eyes.  These days you read American Girl books like cRaZy.  You love the history in them. They are realistic - people die and bad things happen.  You have been moved to tears of genuine empathy for the characters when this happens, which is so precious.  So when you came down with tears in your eyes, I asked if something sad happened at the end.  It wasn't that this time.  No, this time you were moved to tears reading a long-awaited happy ending.  Bless. 
• The night before that you stood at the back door in goggles and tears for a different reason.  You had stepped on a frog in the dark on the way to the hot tub and were totally icked out.  (For the record, I would have screamed and cried myself.)

• And the night after that you came downstairs all red-eyed and quivery well after bedtime to let us know you couldn't get to sleep again.  I understand those poor anxious tears, too.  I hate that you struggle with this.  Lately you need melatonin 1-2 times a week, especially if it's been a busy night and your wind-down routine has been missed.
• Another morning recently, you sat silently on the couch til I woke up.  You were weak-voiced and splotchy faced as you cried and confessed to something that you had been hiding from me for a couple weeks.  I was so thankful for your honesty on your own.  When I asked what made you want to confess now, you said the Holy Spirit.  Precious to this momma's heart.

Oh, the messes ...

I am always, always, always on you about cleaning up after yourself - in the classroom after you have made some craft, in the bathroom after your shower, in your bedroom after any amount of time, at the table after you have dropped a billion crumbs and drips, your hair every morning and afternoon, clutter you have brought and left in the car.  You are so, so, so, so distractable and forgetful.  Lately you struggle to remember the most routine things and common responsibilities.  You struggle to focus and this means things take forrrrrrrevvvvvvvverrrrr or they just don't get done.  It's actually become concerning enough that we are discussing consulting a doctor about ADD?  In the meantime, we soldier on with reminding you that responsibilities precede recreation.

Oh, the words ...

• When Daddy broke a house rule, you reported to me saying, "You either need to spank daddy or pinch his bootie because he put his cup in the wrong place."  I admitted, "Yeah, sometimes Daddies don't follow the rules."  You commented back, "Yeah, sometimes they go off track.”
• Another time with dazed eyes, you murmured, "Sometimes ... I think the TV is mind control ... because no matter what is on ... I stop to watch it."
• After we cut Noah’s hair, you said, “I am gonna be sad for a few days.  I will miss running my fingers through his curls. I love his curls!”
• You say the most random things - Did you know it's raining in Norway?   It is essential for a sailor to know how to sew!  Did you know that a so-and-so bird lays its eggs in another bird's nest so they will take care of it?  That’s like birdie foster care!  Mommy, I sure like piratey, adventurey music (while watching Pirates of the Caribbean).
• One time you responded to my tears in the car by saying, "If you are crying sad and happy tears, I think that makes them SAPPY tears."
• When we realized Lasa was going to stay with us permanently, you shrieked with joy, "I'm a BIG sister now!"
• After Daddy forced you to try shrimp, still chewing, converted, you said, "I guess I WAS missing out."  
• Amazed at the novel feeling of organizing something all by yourself, you proudly announced, “Guess what! I just cleaned out my arts and crafts shelf and I feel SO good!”
• After playing hard on a scorching summer day, I asked if you got too hot.  You blurted back at me, with wide eyes, "Yeah!  I even sweated in my bootie!"
• When I asked you how you liked being a big sister, you confessed, "It's the best, but it's also the worst."

Oh, the fun and quirky things about you these days...

• You never use bookmarks.  You refuse them when I offer. You just remember what chapter you left off on and you like it that way.  It is so bizarre to me.  But it works for you.
• You call the Appalachian Mountains, the Application Mountains.
• Your year has been spent mastering jump rope.  It used to make you scream in frustration.  But you kept at it and now you do it so well and with such excited energy.  I believe you are now up to 420 jumps in a row ... and with your eyes closed, no less! ;) You claim you could have done more but Lasa got in the way.

 

• My favorite thing you learned this year was how to sew.  I love that you love it and ask to do it several times a week.  I love how you fashion and figure out how to make things.  They might be rough around the edges, but your creations are all heart and I am always so impressed.  Most recently, you made a stuffed bear, a freezer pop koozie, and kleenex envelope. 

• Your passion for holidays has turned into your singlehandedly decorating the house.  Some of your Halloween decor this year ... painted styrofoam gravestones for the yard and threatening notes on the front door.

• I love how you are into things that are not typical girly things ... Slingshots, wrestling with your brother, rocks and sticks and mud and leaves, playing in the rain, working with your daddy in the shed.

• You are getting taller, but still as skinny as ever.  48 lbs., Size 6/7 clothes, size 13/1 shoes.
• I stock your closet with cute things.  But you only wear the same plain 5 outfits on repeat.
• You sleep in a little better than Noah ... usually til 7:15ish? Bedtime is at 8.
• You are studying the theology behind salvation and baptism with your daddy at night.
• You love a good hot tub dip just like your daddy.
• You look forward to your hot breakfasts with daddy every morning.
• You love a good snuggle.
• You love Minecraft.
• You love riding your bike. 
• You love texting/Facetiming Daddy at work.  It's so weird to me that you can do this without help. 
• Daddy does all your bedtime routine with you, but somewhere along the way you started coming downstairs to kiss me goodnight.  Every night, a tender little kiss on my cheek while you whisper sleepily "Goodnight, Mommy."
• You have a real knack for writing that you don't even realize yet. I love this!
• We stalled out on your "birthday first" idea this year (I claimed it was the ice cream cake you had never had before - ha!), and then counted the scavenger hunt as your first, but you insist your "birthday first" was getting a little sister.  ❤️
• You are a natural at being a big sister, taking on so many activities with Lasa, teaching her what to do.

 

• You like to hear what you were like at Lasa's age all the time. 
• So we giggle and reminisce often about Angry Anna Baby and Grumpy Anna Toddler.
• You are a standout student ... your work is featured at co-op every week in your teachers pics.
• You are SO SMART. So QUICK-minded.
• Money never burns a hole in your pocket.  You are quite patient saving up money. 
• You say the word "crap" in perfect context and don't even know how funny it sounds coming from you.  I can't blame you; you hear it from me and I know I just won't ever break that habit. :}
• Your favorite friend continues to be your sweet Luci.

• You are such a great shopping buddy for me.
• You almost never get in trouble.  You main vice continues to be outbursts at Noah. And forgetfulness.
• You are just such enjoyable company.   I just love having you around!  
• I think you {might} be turning into a homebody like me.  Still deciding ...

Anna, my sweet, you are my precious girl.  You are my heart. I love how good and slow you are growing up.  I wanna take all the time I can - in these, your perfect big kid years - to enjoy you.  You are a fascinating, delightful child.  And even though you are now the middle child, you will always be my BabyLove.  Happy 8th Birthday, sweetie pie!

Mommy