Before I Forget

Noah, I love the way you make up songs about things in your day or conversations we have. I love how you answer my silly songs with your own silly songs. I love how you respond to music by dancing like crazy all over the room and bopping your head sideways. Even though I sometimes tell you you talk too much, I really love that you talk too much. I also love how I can tell you have been somewhere by the bite marks I find on the toys, clothes, or books. Your nibbling has gone wild. What WILL we do about that? Are you nervous?

Anna, I love how I come upon random things in twos misplaced all around the house - a sure sign that you were there - a thing for each hand that you carried around until you got distracted by something else. I also love how you dip green beans in ketchup. I love how your hair curves around the back of your head and neck like a hobbit's...except for that unpredictable flippy piece on the side. What is that about, anyway? And weirdly, I love how determined you are to NOT smile for my camera, even when I bribe you with chocolate. Will you never lighten up? Why do you hate taking pictures?

At the Lake

We hurried out the door this morning to go play at a nearby lakefront before it got too hot. The breeze was wonderful. The water was, well, nasty lake water. The beach was mostly empty, just like we like it. And the kids were happy playing right at the water's edge. And by kids, I mean Josh as well. He even took off his shoes! Anna, while she was interested in the water and sand, still ended up squatting in a bucket. What can you do? Noah threw rocks. He was happy about the rocks. He was more happy to play on the playground afterward. Boys.


Me, I just enjoyed the shade, enjoyed watching my babies, and enjoyed knowing a holiday weekend as well as several family visits are just days away. Happy Fourth of July week!

Saying Something/Nothing

Things Noah said lately that left me staring blankly:

- I don't wike dat cuz I don't wike dat.

- I can't go back in dare cuz I can't.

- I did dat cuz I did dat.

- I wike dis ting cuz I wike it.

- I no want go potty! I did dat wast time!

- My room hot cuz I sleep.

What?!

(stare) Down in Flames

I can't remember what it was he did this morning that warranted the stare down that I gave him. And I mean stare. down. Hands on hips, head cocked to the left, lips pursed, face frozen in pensive thought so he could soak in the seriousness of his infraction while I pretended to know what I was going to say next. So it really broke my concentration when he said the following:

"Know what I fink, Mommy? I fink you wook wike Peter Pan."

And he proceeded to stand with his hands on his hips; at which point I lost all stare down composure.

There Are Just No Words

There

Are

Just

No Words

for how in love with this little boy I am.

There is no light brighter than my smile when I watch him during his karate class.  There is no reasonable reason for why my eyes water up with pride and adoration to watch him in such a public setting, behaving so well, trying so hard, being so dang beautiful and he doesn't even know it.

I just love him to pieces. And there are no words to match the feeling.

There Are Just No Words

Give the girl a bag of colorful beads and some string and she is sure to do something like this instead. And then cooperate with my taking a picture of it ... which she never does!


There are just no words. The girl never ceases to surprise and delight me. And scare me outta my wits.

(Never fear. I made her GIT the bag OFF her head right away (well, right after I got her to do it again for this photo op) and she was just as tickled with sticking it on her feet.)

First Fruits

Josh and Noah's pretty first fruits from their garden.

Recipe: Spaghetti Pie

Just right, so simple, and delicious. Thank you, E-Mealz. We may never go back to regular spaghetti again.

Spaghetti Pie

1 lb. cooked thin spaghetti
1.3 lbs. ground beef - cooked and drained
26 oz. pasta sauce
16 oz. cottage cheese
2 c shredded mozzarella
3 beaten eggs
1/2 c butter
3/4 c parmesan cheese

Boil pasta, drain. Meanwhile, cook ground beef, drain. Add butter, parmesan cheese, and eggs to the pasta. In a 9x13 sprayed dish, spread the pasta mixture to form a crust. Spread cottage cheese over the pasta, then ground beef, then pasta sauce. Bake uncovered at 325 for 60 minutes. Top w/mozzarella cheese and return to oven for 5 minutes or until melted. Let stand 5 minutes before cutting.

Smells great while cooking. Tastes great while eating. Makes less mess for uncoordinated kiddo hands that struggle to manage forks/spoons. Love that.

On a Hot, Hot Day

It's freaking hot around our neck of the woods. 99 degrees hot.

We spent a lot of time in the water outside today. Pool, baby pool, hose, water table, water guns. Handfuls of spit, if you're Anna. I spent a lot of time huddled under the umbrella sweating to death. And worrying that my kids were getting burnt.

I mercilessly sprayed my family with the hose. Noah may have cried. But I let him get me back a number of times so it's all good.

Our back porch is draped with wet clothes and towels for the third time today. It's so hot, everything air dries that fast. Enough to dry and wear them again three times!

Anna is well practiced at stripping off her diaper, but now she does it in less than 4 seconds flat if we so much as mention getting in the pool, which we did, like I said, 3 times.

After a shower and some time on the couch, my feet are still stinging from walking on the hot concrete. Noah's feet smell like chlorine.

It's so hot, we don't even want food. So tonight's dinner entree (spaghetti pie) just got switched out for watermelon.


Drippy, delicious, no cooking required. Perfect for a hot, hot day.

Beatin' the Heat

Happy Daddy's Day

There's a reason Anna cries like she's dying when you leave.
There's a reason Noah waits desperately for you to return.
You are the shining, fun, safe, loving rock in our days,
And time just drags by without you.


We love you like crazy.


Happy Daddy's Day!
The Wifey, The Gamer, and The Drama Queen

Gross "Anna"tomy

Anna is testing the waters of potty training lately which means she spends a little more time without any pants on. So I knew the anatomy question was coming. Noah was bound to take note. I'm actually surprised he hasn't mentioned it before now, to be honest.

This morning, when Anna stood after another potty session, Noah, concerned at what he finally took note of, grabbed her shirt, lifted it up, pointed, and exclaimed, "Daddy! Anna no pee-pee on there!"

Thoughts from the Belly

Josh and Noah got to talking about adoption last night at bedtime.

Josh: Do you remember whose belly you grew in?
Noah: Tanna (Tania)
Josh: Do you know what that's called when you grow in someone else's belly and come home with Mommy and Daddy? That's called adoption.
Noah: I no go back Tanna's bewwy.
Josh: No you won't go back to Tania's belly. You're my son. You will be with us forever.
Noah: I cry in Tanna's bewwy.
Josh: Why did you cry?
Noah: Because I miss you, Daddy!

Ohhhhh. Steal. My. Heart. As an adoptive parent, those are sweet and tender words to take in.

And it reminds me vividly of how we prayed protection over Noah's mind and heart and development while he was exposed to the stress, chaos, and upset in Tania's life when she was pregnant with him. To know and love the boy as we do and to recognize and appreciate the perfectly healthy bonding we have with him makes me sing praises to God for hearing our prayers for him way back then. Because if he was stressed in utero, according to Noah, it wasn't because his little body and mind were weakened under the burden that Tania bore - it was because he was missing us already.

Amens: Psalm

This book was interesting to read from The Message but nowhere near as well-worded and near and dear to my heart as the translations I know by heart - NIV, NKJV, NLT. Still, some notables from this version...

Psalm 22:23 - Shout Hallelujah, you God-worshippers...

Psalm 23:6 - Your beauty and love chase after me every day of my life.

Psalm 37:34 - Wait passionately for God, don't leave the path.

Psalm 37:37 - Keep your eye on the healthy soul, scrutinize the straight life; There's a future in strenuous wholeness.

Psalm 37:39,40 - The spacious, free life is from God; it's also protected and safe. God-strengthened, we're delivered from evil - when we run to him, he saves us.

Psalm 63:3 - In your generous love I am really living...

Psalm 64:10 - Good-hearted people, make praise your habit.

Psalm 65:1,2 - Silence is praise to you ... And also obedience. You hear the prayer in it all.

Psalm 65:5,6,7,8 - Earth-Tamer, Ocean-Pourer, Mountain-Maker, Hill-Dresser, Muzzler of sea storm and wave crash, of mobs in noisy riot - Far and wide they'll come to a stop, they'll stare in awe, in wonder. Dawn and dusk take turns calling, "Come and worship."

Psalm 66:4 - ...can't stop enjoying your name and fame.

Psalm 89:7,8 - ... he looms immense and august ... powerful and faithful from every angle...

Psalm 89:15 - Blessed are the people that know the passwords of praise...

Psalm 90:2 - From "once upon a time" to "kingdom come" - you are God.

Psalm 112:7,8 - Unfazed by rumor and gossip; Heart ready, trusting in God, Spirit firm, unperturbed, Ever blessed, relaxed among enemies...

Psalm 119:175,176 - Invigorate my soul so I can praise you well, use your decrees to put iron in my soul. And should I wander off like a lost sheep - seek me! I'll recognize your voice.

Amens: Romans

My latest faves from The Message translation of the Bible.

Romans 5: 3,4,5 - We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never shortchanged. Quite the contrary - we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit.

Romans 7:12 - But the law code itself is God's good and common sense, each command sane and holy counsel.

Romans 11:22 - Make sure you stay alert to these qualities of gentle kindness and ruthless severity that exist side by side in God - ruthless with the deadwood, gentle with the grafted shoot. But don't presume on this gentleness.

Romans 11:33 - Have you ever come on anything quite like this extravagant generosity of God, this deep, deep wisdom? It's way over our heads. We'll never figure it out.

Romans 11:36 - Everything comes from him; Everything happens through him; Everything ends up in him. Always glory! Always praise! Yes. Yes. Yes.

Romans 14:5 - So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ's body, let's just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren't.

Romans 14:6,7,8 - If you preach, just preach God's Message, nothing else; if you help, just help, don't take over; if you teach, stick to your teaching; if you give encouraging guidance, be careful that you don't get bossy; if you're put in charge, don't manipulate; if you're called to give aid to people in distress, keep your eyes open and quick to respond; if you work with the disadvantaged, don't let yourself get irritated with them or depressed by them. Keep a smile on your face.

Romans 14:10,11 - So where does that leave you when you criticize a brother? And where does that leave you when you condescend to a sister? I'd say it leaves you looking pretty silly - or worse. Eventually, we're all going to end up kneeling side by side in the place of judgement, facing God. Your critical and condescending ways aren't going to improve your position there one bit.

Romans 14:12 - So tend to your knitting. You've got your own hands full just taking care of your own life before God.

Romans 14:18 - Your task is to single-mindedly serve Christ. Do that and you'll kill two birds with one stone: pleasing God above you and proving your worth to the people around you.

Romans 15:2 - Strength is for service, not status.

Romans 15:5,6 - God wants the combination of his steady, constant calling and warm, personal counsel in Scripture to come to characterize us, keeping us alert for whatever he will do next. May our dependably steady and warmly personal God develop maturity in you so that you get along with each other as well as Jesus gets along with us all. Then we'll be a choir - not our voices only, but our very lives singing in harmony in a stunning anthem to the God and Father of our Master Jesus!

It's a Sickness, Really

In the spirit of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie ...

If you send a mommy to the kitchen to wash her hands
she'll notice the dishwasher needs to be emptied.

When she starts putting those dishes away
she'll notice chicken needs to be set out for dinner.

After she gets the chicken out
she'll be unable to stop herself from reorganizing the freezer.

When she turns around
she'll remember she didn't finish emptying the dishwasher.

As she glances down from the cabinet where the bowls go
she'll start assembling sippy cup parts that dried overnight.

When she sets a completed cup down
she'll notice some crumbs on the counter.

After she's wiped ALL the counters
she'll see the sink and remember she never washed her hands.

While she dries her hands
she'll hear a strange sound coming from the fridge.

After hunting the sound down to a bird in the garage
she'll laugh at her distractedness and start making a list about it.

When she wraps that list up
she'll look down and see the dishwasher still needs emptying.

After she's emptied and reloaded the dishwasher
she'll want to wash her hands again.

Recipe: Chicken Salad

Light. Simple. Satisfying. And oh so summery.

Chicken Salad

1 rotisserie chicken, meat pulled off
2 apples, peeled and chopped (I did not peel, we like the peel)
1 rib celery, finely chopped (we skipped this, but won't next time)
1/4 cup mayo
1/4 cup sour cream

Combine chicken, apples, celery, mayo, and sour cream.
Cover and chill, if desired (which we did). Salt and pepper to taste.
Served with corn on the cob and toasted English muffins as directed on our e-meals menu.

Noah's Recipe for Growth

Noah started his Lil' Dragons Karate class this week. And Josh and I were suckers for the sight of him in his uniform among the other kids, making those martial art moves, practicing strength, obedience, agility, speed, focus, and respect. Keepin' up with the big kids from his row with the little guys in the back. (and listening better than the big kids, too, for that matter!)

But mostly, we were suckers for how dang cute he was, how much he stood out from the others. Littlest one in the group, poor thing. Smaller than the rest of the 4 year olds ... even the girls ... by a whole head. I mean, if it's possible, he looks smaller than normal in that setting. But oh my gosh, freakin' adorable. I could just swallow him whole.

But while his shortness is cute and all, it still makes me worry a little about this growth and development. So I am doing what little things I can to help his growth - seeing to it he drinks more milk, takes vitamins, gets good rest, eats vegetables, runs, and plays. Noah gets an earful of why these things are good for him, too. Especially about the milk and veggies and fruit.

This morning he said this to me, "Wook, Mommy! My milk almost gone! Milk helps me grow, wight? And carrots, and broccoli, and video games, and cantawoupe, too."

Treasuring Toddlerhood

I do a lot of grinning at the montage of moments that is a day in our life with you, Anna, at 20 months old. Your toddler days are a real treat. I did a "Treasuring Toddlerhood" post for Noah way back at the beginning of my blog (while I was pregnant with you actually) and now here you are a toddler yourself. Can it be? Are you nearing 2 already? How can I adore someone so hard? How can even your bad traits steal my heart? How is it I never tire of just staring at your pretty little head and body while you sit there or go about your day? Here are some memories I'll always treasure about your early toddler days, Annabelle.

• You are quickly getting a grasp of the way things should be done. And you are tenacious about that grasp; I wonder if that makes you a bit of a type A personality? Some examples of how you are a miniature control freak, wanting things just the way they should be: If I head for the door without my shoes on, you panic and point it out to me. If Max gets muddy on an episode of Max and Ruby, you get antsy and moan and cry out. If I am nearby, you pat the couch to get me to sit next to you. If you can't get your shoes off on your own, you work your cry up into a growly scream - a roar, I guess you could call it. If you have a fry, there must be dip on the way or it just will not do for you. If your sippy cup empties, you find it impossible to leave it be; to you it is critical that we jump to fill it or face your wrath. If you are playing outside, you get anxious if you don't have a hat. If a hose is on, you insist on playing in the water. If I leave out a snack for you to graze on, you end up keeping it in your own play skillet. If a seat has a buckle, then by golly, we better buckle it for you. And lately, if we are using the bathroom, you think we owe you a potty session of your own. You get antsy if sand sticks to your feet, or if you don't get dressed as soon as Noah does. When you can't manipulate your fingers and your toys/stickers you fly into a tot-sized rage. Sometimes just because Noah won't hand over whatever it is you suddenly want. You are concerned if we don't conduct the elements of Noah's quiet time in order. You've gotten upset because we've left a lamp on as we leave the house. You put bracelets on your feet and just get downright pissed when you can't get them off. Same goes for your tu-tu. And your shoes, but I already said that.
• For some strange reason, you stand with your hand down the back of your pants but still outside of your diaper.
  
• You still like to finger paint with your spit.
  
• You've discovered the mirror on the wall in the living room so now I have to keep on you to stop climbing up on the ottoman to look at yourself, especially if Noah tells you you look funny or your hair is messy.
  
• Your most recent favorite book is Llama, Llama, Red Pajama.
  
• You still jump to it if I send you to time out, but how long you stay there and what you do there is still a bit of a loose interpretation for you.
  
• I have no idea why, but you always, always start blowing raspberries when we sing in your presence.
  
• You show a very selfish side by claiming what you want with "Mine!" And you out and out disobey when I insist you share. This is new for me to address because Noah never had that impulse. To this day, he does not have that impulse...which makes you a lucky girl, albeit selfish.
  
• You stare like a zombie at your favorite shows - Curious George and Max and Ruby. Between you and me I adore that you adore Max and Ruby. I was sad when Noah lost interest in the show.
  
• We have not started real potty training just yet, but it is certainly on the radar. Right now we just flirt with the concept. We ask if you want to go pee pee on the potty and you always agree. You don't sit long, and you don't do anything. But you are interested and cooperative, so we'll go with it. You keep stripping your pants and diaper off at random times in the day, so I now have pull-ups on the shopping list and we'll see where that takes us.
• You love foods that require dips, but without fail, you ditch the food and just use your finger, which means you are eating plain ketchup, sour cream, syrup, barbecue sauce.
  
• You don't take a bite of anything we offer you without a tester nibble first. If food is not the texture you anticipated you let it fall out of your mouth no matter how much I protest or demand that you don't.
  
• You want your back tickled, but you insist I do it under your shirt.
  
• You cock your head forward and frown and furl your eyebrows like a professional. Like your mommy. When put on the spot, you stand and look down and get wide eyes and a pouty mouth. Noah does a real good "Anna" imitation. It's pretty hilarious how much attention to detail he has when he does it.
• You are also becoming a bit of a pen and paper fiend like your mommy. You have a spiral notebook that you are quite attached to. You sprawl on your belly and just go at it. You give it such focused attention. Almost all the pages are drawn on. You even stick your crayons in the binding just like they do on Blue's Clues. Maybe that is where you got the idea to begin with.
• You totally dig water play. If it's got water, it's got you! Sprinklers, fountains, pools, hoses, water tables, puddles, rain, sinks. You are every facet of "water baby".
  
• These days you are a very capable monkey. I can't keep you from climbing on the oven, bar-height chairs, and the railing of the stairs.
• You climb up the swing set and slide down reliably and capably enough now that I don't feel the need to stand right beside you. Ahhhh, freedom ... for us both!
  
• You are also obsessed with the contents of my nightstand so we have to keep a close eye on you if you are ever in our room. You beeline for it and just stand and stare. And somehow, when we aren't looking, you end up rearranging things.
  
• You've recently fallen in love with yourself - more specifically, watching yourself on home videos.
  
• And when you get excited while waiting for something you lean forward and over and then try to jump up, but it only comes across looking like an awkward stilted bop up and down. Speaking of bopping, you still never dance. You don't notice music and rhythm in that way at all, not even when we prompt you.
  

Some of my favorite words you are attempting lately:
Jew - George (as in Curious George)
Doh - Dora
Maaa, Wubby - Max, Ruby
Whoa whoa - pillow
Woo - room
Bot - bite
JeeJee - stinky
Bahboo - buckle
Daw- draw
Hah - hat
Shuh Shuh - marshmallow
Shee Shee - princess
Ow?!! - Help!
Jawty - dirty (as in dirty diaper)
Nuh - Anna



I just can't believe how much you have changed in a year's time.















You are just beautiful and precious and lovable, Anna. I am so lucky to call you mine.

Quote: Waiting

This quote comes from Unafraid, speaks of Mary who was struggling with the wait for her son, Jesus, to claim his kingdom. And even when he did it, it wasn't as she had expected it would be. For me, this quote comes as an encouragement to submit to the Lord while we wait through this adoption. And not to set myself up for disappointment when the end does not look like I think it will. I'm pretty sure my expectations are too small and too self-centered anyway. So I choose to lay them down and just obey today. And today. And today.

"Waiting was the hardest thing to do ... Each day was a refining fire. Each day brought the question, Will you obey no matter the cost?
'Today, I say yes.'
'Mother?'
'Today I say yes. And today, and today, and today, until there are no more todays left.' "

Amens: Acts

So I finally, finally finished Acts. These are some stand-out verses for me from this translation, The Message.

Acts 2: 23,24 - ... this Jesus, following the deliberate and well-thought-out plan of God, was betrayed by men who took the law into their own hands, and was handed over to you. And you pinned him to a cross and killed him. But God untied the death ropes and raised him up.

Acts 2: 12 - Salvation comes no other way; no other name has been or will be given to us by which we can be saved, only this one.

Acts 15: 14 - ... build up muscle and sinew in those congregations.

Acts 20: 13 - "You're looking at this backward. The issue in Jerusalem is not what they do to me, whether arrest or murder, but what the Master Jesus does through my obedience. Can't you see that?"

Acts 26: 17 - " ' I'm sending you off to open the eyes of the outsiders so they can see the difference between dark and light, and choose light, see the difference between Satan and God, and choose God. I'm sending you off to present my offer of sins forgiven, and a place in the family, inviting them into the company of those who begin real living by believing in me.' "

Acts 26: 23 - "One, the Messiah must die; two, raised from the dead, he would be the first rays of daylight shining on people far and near; people both godless and God-fearing."

Some Days Are Like That

I had a particularly rough afternoon with Noah yesterday. It didn't help that I had my parents, a captive audience, in the car witnessing Noah's increasingly irrational and irritating meltdown and my subsequent outburst. By the end of the ugly ride home, my head was pounding still from my migraine, my dad had scolded Noah (which scared him all the more), I had stopped the car to spank him (Noah, not my dad), I had reached back while driving to spank him again when he openly defied me, Anna was in tears, I had yelled, and it was all my mom could do not to laugh. It was all I could do, too, not to tell her to stop trying to reason with the boy and that she was only making it worse. It was a bad fallout. Bad. I seriously had to will my own tears away. And then I laughed to hear in my mind something Josh said the previous week when I made the mistake of picking a food battle with Anna: "Model parenting, it was not."

To Noah's credit, once he stopped heaving, wailing, disobeying, crying, and being swatted at from the front seat, he did say he didn't want to disobey again and that he was having a bad day (this made me think of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day - how fitting). I agreed with him (because "some days are like that") and we agreed together he would try again tomorrow. Later on while Noah napped, I sat at the counter asking myself what I could have done to prevent that situation from coming to a head. I have a number of ideas about that. But I won't go into those. They are better summed up in a very timely post I read today about Patient Motherhood . It was particularly helpful, practical, and inspired. And encouraging. And even a little soothing to me and my ruffled feathers. So I thought maybe it would be the same for any of you moms I know that are also looking headlong into a summer of possibly similar (although hopefully rare) moments as well. It's a good, to-the-point reality check. The quote that stood out the most to me said that the "fruit of my frustration is bound to be rotten." I sure felt like this was true of me (Noah, too) yesterday.

On a separate note (but still about good reads) I finished the last of the Lineage of Grace series today. The final book, Unafraid, told from Mary's perspective, was quite a teaching tool to my heart. I may have cried a few times. Good series; I totally recommend it. Francine Rivers, you just keep going up in my book!